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Andrew Dice Clay kept his word, and kept it dirty
Inside the Telegraph
Don Chaddock • The Telegraph
The stage was set at Tommy T's Saturday night for Andrew "Dice" Clay's performance. No photography or cell phone use was allowed during the show.

By Don Chaddock, Telegraph Managing Editor

On Saturday, a video of comedian Andrew "Dice" Clay giving Charlie Sheen a piece of his mind went viral, just days after Clay told me in an interview he wouldn't use Sheen in his stand-up material.

Considering I had tickets, along with Telegraph Sports Editor Matt Long, to see "Dice" Saturday evening at Tommy T's Dinner Theatre in Rancho Cordova, I was concerned. Would the bad boy of comedy skewer Sheen on stage, much like he did in the viral video? Would Clay call the self-described "winner" an "f*****g loser"?

No, he didn't. While Clay may be a foul-mouthed "pig," (a description he freely uses for himself and all men), he kept his word.

His comedy routine touched on Tiger Woods' sexual exploits, aging, dating women who aren't dainty, the secret to picking up "chicks" and other topics too risque for this site.

Clay's off-color brand of humor packed the house at Tommy T's.

Clay, seen sporting an eye patch in the viral video in which he rants about how Sheen needs professional help (easily found on YouTube), emerged in the spotlight in Rancho Cordova wearing the same eye patch along with a leather vest, gloves and tight pants. He was "Dice," as many would know him, only older and with a little less hair.

The comedian didn't steer clear of his age, poking fun at himself throughout his act.

"I have to explain this eye patch," he said. "They're calling me a f*****g pirate now. ... It's that when you get older, things start to break. I can't see, that's all."

While funny, his publicist told me Clay had minor eye surgery last week. In fact, that surgery is what postponed my originally scheduled interview.

Clay worked the crowd and called people out when needed. One lady, sitting front-and-center, was taken to task by Clay for using her cell phone during his act.

At $40 per head, no one wanted to be tossed out.

"What did they tell you before the show?" he asked. "Are you her husband? How long?"

The man's response was "maybe" and "long enough."

"Oh, long enough to know she won't listen," he jibed. "What do you think? Do we throw her out?"

He slammed Internet usage, Twitter, Google and just about any other piece of modern technology.

"I don't even go to parties anymore," he said. "You know why? All they talk about are their phones."

Clay's act is crude, vulgar and stuffed full of sexual references. But when you get tickets to see "Dice," you know what's in store for you.

"Dice" may not be considered classy, but he's a class act for keeping his word and leaving Sheen and his troubles out of his routine.

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